The time has finally arrived for me to leave Germany. Tomorrow, I get on a plane with my Emma and head home to a new life.
I am struggling to decide who I want to be when I arrive there. I have an opportunity to redefine myself, therefore redefining acceptable ways for people to treat me. If I go back the way I was when I left, then nothing will have changed. Despite the enlisted to officer change, there will be no respect gained. It's imperative that I maintain my professionalism at all times, and do not fall back on old habits.
My soon to be ex-husband left yesterday. I thought I would be sad despite wanting the divorce, but I wasn't it. It was one of the first times in a long time that I didn't come home to verbal and emotional abuse. I didn't have to worry about that or watch what I said. It was nice and I'm looking forward to a world where I can be myself again, and not what I've had to be to survive being married to him.
I look forward to reuniting with my friends and family and seeing the sun again. (You miss it when you live here!) I am going to miss Germany though. I've made some friends here and I love my house, but it's been more like jail here than anything.
So off I go. Time to take control and make life the way I want it to be. I can't wait to seize the opportunities coming my way!